Working Title: “Slow Boat, Bitter End”

A Rony Boston Mystery

“The Lord has struck him down by the hand of a woman”. So says Judith, a young Jew from Bethulia, in the bible when she describes her heroic act that freed the people of Israel from the siege by Nebuchadnezzar's army.

(This is a work of fiction, which means the author makes up stuff and tries to make it seem as if it might really have happened. Names, Characters, organizations, businesses, events, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is incidental. Artificial intelligence platforms are occasionally used for research but not for writing assistance. The author messes that up on his own.)

JUDITH BEGAN: I’M NOT sure about this lying, so I’ll start with the truth. It’s no red herring either, Neil. I’ll tell you this, and you can call it fact number one. I absolutely love history. I’m self-taught; never went to college. I like European history. One doesn’t have to go to university to inform themselves about a simple subject like history. All you must do is read, read, read. That’s what I do. Fact Number Two: I’m inspired by art, which I love. I’ve been to Rome and to Florence, and I love all the famous artists. Gentileschi is my favorite of all. Fact No. 3: In Beaufort there is a statue of one of my ancestors, just like you, Vasil. And it’s in honor of his artistic contributions to the Low Country. That’s what we call it down there: The Low Country. OK, that’s my story and I’m sticking with it. What do you think, Geoffrey?

I’d already come to think of Geoffrey as the thoughtful one in our group. I wasn’t entirely ready for his response, however.

Judith, I do not think you are a liar or a fraud at all. As you have said, lying isn’t something you suffer quietly. It is my judgment that you have lied only about the last statement, that there is a statue in your town that honors an ancestor of yours. I think you got that idea from our friend Vasil, and so I call you out. How about it? Confess to the truth and let’s watch you join the very best of this besotted bunch!

Ah, Geoffrey, you have unclothed the fiction. In fact, my family isn’t noted for much of anything down in South Carolina except for its simplicity, poverty and kindness. Let’s have that ouzo, Abra!

You’re on your own, honey, Abra said. She elbowed Judith once again and Judith tipped her glass. Geoffrey went on.

But I wonder if you have developed a fondness for Gentileschi because of your name. Isn’t it one of her most famous paintings? The one that involves Judith in the process of committing a gruesome murder?

Oh, you’ve seen it? Isn’t it horrible?

That it is, Geoffrey said. Absolutely, horribly, realistically horrible! And exquisitely beautiful. It could not be more realistic. And to think of the grisly scene of the famous crime rendered by a great artist in artistic detail! Of all the paintings I’ve ever seen, this one tells us as much about the artist as it does about the subject of the art. One could make a long list of questions just standing before it. I saw it in Florence at the Uffizi in, let’s see, what year was it? Hmmm. May 1992, I believe.

Maybe you saw it but probably not in Florence. You might be thinking of the Donatello bronze or one of the other renderings of the murder. I think Gentileschi’s painting is in Naples.

You’re the self-taught historian, Judith. I’ll take your word for it, but not without a counter argument. I think it’s in the Uffizi. And isn’t it odd that your friend has the same name as Judith’s accomplice? Isn’t that right, Abra? Are we safe with you two aboard this vessel? At least let’s hope no one here has lain siege to Beaufort and is destined for retribution! In any event, I’m going to have another ouzo in honor of your erudition and your honesty. I will say before I tip my glass to you, however, that you should know that your eyes give you away, as with so many inexperienced liars. Ha! Isn’t it good to know you are a good and honest person and not a brilliant liar? Saloon-a!

Appropriately and with growing gusto, we all took another drink of the salubrious liquor from Greece. It was Geoffrey’s turn.

You must know, my friends, that I am a man of broad interests, and a few of them have provided me a wonderful life. So here are the facts, ma’am, as Joe Friday would have said. Fact number one is that my family, like Judith’s, is quite humble. My mother was born in a sod house in Nebraska. My father was a carpenter. Fact number two is that I am the first in my family to achieve a college degree, a bachelor’s in psychology with a minor in English. Fact number three is this: I had a fine career, not teaching but investing. In technology. As a result of my wealth, I became a philanthropist supporting many good causes. How about it, Abra? Truth and a lie. Which is which?

His reference to Joe Friday threw me into a momentary spin as I dredged my brain cells and finally came up with the old detective show, Dragnet. Ha, I thought. I could write a book about the things I’ve forgotten, if only I could remember them. But why would this younger man have any memory of that show? For me, at fifty-five, the show is only a vague memory. A crime, investigation, and conclusion in about twenty minutes. Good old gum-shoe detective work, not by a private eye, but by a police force detective with matter-of-fact skills. Anyway, my mind was wandering.

Abra giggled and said to Judith; Oh boy oh boy. Another ouzo, eh, Judith? I think you are an educated man, Geoffrey, and very thoughtful. I like what you’ve told us, and I hope it’s all true. But if I must single out the lie, I’d say that you’re not the first in your family to achieve a college degree. I think that despite your humble background, you and your siblings were given proper values, motivation and ambition. I suspect an older sibling or two also has a higher education.

Geoffrey said, Oh dear. I am no better at this than you, Judith, and for that I’m grateful. I did come from a good family, prosperous but not wealthy. My siblings, all three of them, have college degrees. Even though my studies were in the social sciences, I was drawn to management, landed a position with a high-tech computer company in the early 1980s, took as much of my salary as I could in equity, and did rather well, if I do say so myself. I’d say I’m so enamored of the American Dream that I have enjoyed using some of my earnings to pay it forward, as the cliché goes. I support good causes. Medicine, art and music. Guess I need to drink up, right? Will everyone join me?

(To Be Continued)

Feb. 12, 2025